FelonyWorkout

FelonyWorkout

Roughest, toughest prison workout · Est. 2011

Goin' in? Better get your shit together, foo.

Bodyweight work for a 4'×8' cell. Don't want to build anything? Press play on one of the 10 ready-made routines. Try the free sample sheet, then get the Commissary Pass: every move, every routine, the whole uncut library, $9.99 once.

Try the free sheet
A note from Oz

What if I told you that you can get as ripped up and dangerous as the most thuggish mofos out there? What if I could teach you secrets that will make you feared and respected? Black magic, karate, hypnosis, the death touch. You can learn these secrets and many more, if you just dare to seize the opportunity.

Would you be surprised if I told you it could happen with less than 15 minutes a day of practice? The Felony Workout can take you from fish to thug within eight weeks or less. You'll find hidden secrets on this site that the Authorities want to hide from you.

Fight the power, Oz

Two ways to train today

Build your own sheet

Made to measure. Tell us where you're serving it, how long you've got and how hard you can take it, and we write the workout. Then the player calls every move out loud: countdown, beeps, the lot. No thinking, no counting.

$9.99 once
Where you're serving it
Time on the clock
Rank
What you're working
Dept. of Corrections · Yard Sheet
Case no.

Approved for yard
Sentence
Format
Rank
Space

Follow along, full screen. Each move comes up with a countdown and a beep when it's time to switch.

    00:00Count time
    Rounds served
    No marks on the wall yet.

    Commissary's Open.

    Ten bucks. One time. No subscription, we're not the state.

    • Build any sheet you want. Cell, yard or iron pile · 10 to 45 minutes · Fish to Lifer · six focuses.
    • 41 moves, looped till you get 'em right. Shown by a guy who's clearly done his time.
    • All 10 Classics. The Fish, Seg, Bad Seed, Brutal: the routines that built the legend.
    • The whole library, uncut. Every article as it was written, nothing sanded off.

    Your email, and the builder plus every animated move open up for 24 hours. No card.

    One-time payment. Yours for life. 7-day refunds, no questions asked. Secure checkout by Stripe. By buying you agree to the Terms.

    A few of the moves you unlock — swipe through them

    • Free sample sheetFree
    • Build your own sheetMembers
    • 41 animated movesMembers
    • 10 Classic routinesMembers
    • Full follow-along playerMembers
    • 17 library articlesMembers

    The Classics

    Nothing to build: press play and follow along. The original routines, 2011–2015, from The Fish for beginners up to Brutal. Start off with Bad Seed and move to Brutal.

    Your Record

    Everything you've done here, counted. Nobody sees this but you — it's kept on this device, and it follows the Pass when you're signed in.

    Classification Intake

    The tally

    Marks on the wall

    The Library

    17 articles from the original felonyworkout.com, uncut, as written. 3 are open to everyone; the rest come with the Pass.

    Commissary

    Goin' in soon? Better hit it and bulk up. Use this shake as your starter supplement. You can get the ingredients for cheap.

    Muscle Builder Drink

    • Whey protein1 scoop
    • Creatine1 spoon
    • Glutamine1 spoon
    • Antioxidant powder1 spoon
    • Gatorade powder1 spoon

    Mix with water and drink it down. Ensure that you're lifting 2x a day and drinking this shake 2x a day.

    Pre-Workout

    • Gatorade16 oz
    • Creatine5 g
    • Whey protein1 scoop

    During

    • Branched chain aminos

    The Bulk Cup

    About 1,050 calories · 55 g protein

    One cup, a thousand calories, for men who can't eat enough to grow.

    The Lean-Down Cup

    About 300 calories · 35 g protein

    Thick, cold and filling, for when the belt's getting tight.

    Post-Workout

    • Gatorade16 oz
    • Creatine5 g
    • Glutamine1 scoop
    • Whey protein1 scoop
    • Vitamin B6/B12 complex1
    • Branched chain aminos

    "Supplements aren't a crutch you pussy." Read the whole thing in the Library.

    Commissary's Open.

    Ten bucks. One time. Every move, every routine, every uncut article. No gym, no membership, no parole officer.

    One-time payment. Yours for life. No subscription, we're not the state. 7-day refunds, no questions asked. Secure checkout by Stripe. By buying you agree to the Terms.

    Before we start

    Who's running you today?

    A voice in your ear for the whole workout, calling the moves and the last ten seconds. Change it any time with the Coach button up top.

    Turn your volume up. Neither of them does encouragement.